Yes...I mean, No... Hello, Empty World!

Ah, how lovely life is sometimes, huh? You can get so caught up in it, that when stop to relax,you realize that you haven't accomplished nearly as much as you originally intended. 

I've been doing hip-hop ministry for about 5 years now, and it's funny how no matter how many times I approach my recording equip with a new song, I still fall prey to the unjust reality that I just don't have that raw natural talent. 

Yeah, sad truth is, I'm one of those guys who struggles everytime I get on the mic. I can't freestyle, I stutter and stumble on my words when I try to rap.... a good song comes outta me every once in a while. 

To think, I had a pretty big fanbase at one time.. now, where are they? Don't get me wrong, I can be hated by everyone and I would still come out successful if it's God's will in my life... I just... well, how many times have you looked hard at all you've done and realized how much it feels like just no one gives a crud? 

I'm 25 years old. I have an indy label, but if you look at it, my messageboard is completely barren. I've done everything in the book far as I can think of to help boost activity and advertise. There just doesn't seem to be an interest. And yet, I'm investing hundreds if not thousands into things like D2S FEST and upgrading my equipment to try and get into it more...

I LOVE what I do... love it... but where and when am I supposed to see the fruits of my own labor? 

It just seems like such a lonely road and all that gets sent my way are either people who need MY help, or are great people but have no way of helpding me. 

Why do I always get left out? Why does this world seem so... empty to me?